A serial non-monogamist?
Yeah right, mom, "a friend."
Did my mother’s extra-marital affairs—this one fairly short, the other decades long—make me more accepting of infidelity as an adult?
My father also dabbled, and why wouldn’t he? This was Hollywood in the 70’s+, and my mother’s long-time lover often left messages with him when she was too busy to answer the phone.
But no, I did not emerge from that tumultuous childhood with a laissez-fare attitude to monogamy. In my lifelong campaign to make sure my apple fell as far as possible from my parent’s tree, I became a 99% serial monogamist, with an visceral horror of lying and cheating spouses. That my first husband would turn out to be one of them is one of life’s cruelly ironic twists. Or perhaps it was my inescapable destiny.
How do YOU feel about the issue of monogamy? Is it an un-natural, outmoded condition, to be pooh-poohed, or a cherished and necessary feature of a committed relationship?
Four Tidbits For The Week of January 28, 2024
Brigit’s What I’m…
DOING NOW ➡️ Experimenting with Facebook Live (be very afraid) CURRENTLY LOVING ➡️My awesome sister authors at Sibylline Press THINKING ABOUT ➡️ 32 days to the RottenKid launch; but who's counting? LISTENING TO ➡️The welcome rain at Refugio; Green hills a'comin'!
I feel if you make a promise to an individual, you should keep it. Including marriage vows. If you don’t feel you can keep the vow, you owe it to the other, to be honest. And tell them before you choose to cheat. No matter where that takes you. I have always said I would do that. IF, I ever would choose to do such a thing, There would never be any surprises that way. And I would expect the same from my spouse or lover. Much better to know, than not know. Or hear it from another source, That’s just my belief.
Up to the individuals. I would never pretend to understand what goes on in others' relationships, but as long as they have healthy, agreed upon boundaries - and are transparent and do no harm, then do as you will.